Steve Pavlina and Dating

NOPE! He is not a dating coach! Not also a seducer (at least in profession). He is a writer and an entrepreneur.

Steve Pavlina is a recent addition to a few people that I am interested in. Along with the list are the hypnotist Paul McKenna and the dating instructor/visionary Owen Cook aka Tyler Durden. I stumbled upon Pavlina while searching a way to increase my web traffic and I was caught off guard, this man is something..

The article of Pavlina that swept me is the top listed writing of him entitled, ‘10 Reasons You Should Never Get a Job.’ This is a very amusing article especially for me who is currently unemployed for about a year after graduating with a degree in Philosophy in one of the most prestigious university here in the Philippines. While my colleagues are out there, working or studying law or graduate studies, I’m here in my own bubble, fooling around and writing.
Below are the points I learned from Steve Pavlina at least in the article that I mention, 10 Reasons You Should Never Get a Job.

CONTRASTS

• If you want to be successful, do the things that are not done by the majority of people. In his article, he tackled people getting a job after in a specific time of their life. For him this people are getting no where. His argument, most of this people only earn while they are at work (with a salary cap). Common sense will tell you that why not earn even you are out of work. Why not earn when you are sleeping, eating or even when you are fooling around.
• Same concepts applied in dating, if you want to be successful (by successful I mean REALLY successful, not just having ‘a’ partner) do the opposite what most of the people will do. If most men will court a girl, talk about their feelings, shower them gifts and cling to them as if they cannot live without the girl then DO NOT DO THESE THINGS. It is not that these things don’t work (they work in some cases) but the payoff is not enough, Why not be the jerk who barely call the girl but ripped all the benefits of the relationship?
  

OFFER VALUE

• For Pavlina, the best thing that you can do to make your site grow is to offer value — in bloggers’ language it is to offer a useful and helpful content for your readers. Forget the PTC advertisements and Paid Traffic Hits, they are mere band-aid solutions for your problem in traffic. Though at first, no one is reading you despite the great content you have in your blog, you will see in time that people will go back to your site due to the value you are offering to them.
  
• In dating, the most effective way of attracting people in your life is to offer value to them. However unlike in the bloggers context, how we define value in this male to female dynamics is much more complicated. In my opinion value in this context is not showering gifts, bombarding them with compliments and other nice guy things (though there are cases that these things work). Value is something else, much more complicated than you think. You can learn more in my previous post here.
  
  
  THE INNER WISDOM

• You often hear the term instinct or first instinct? I believe that this is the inner wisdom that always guide us to tell what is the right decision. However, most of the time this wisdom is clouded by the ‘wisdom’ of other people who in reality does not know anything. As Owen Cook discussed it in his Blueprint, this is what he referred as Social Conditioning. Though most of this conditioning are good, the ones that does not served you should be thrown away. Summing it up to my own philosophy, Beliefs are tools, if it no longer serve you, you are free to throw them away.

In my reading of Steve Pavlina I can see that he opened many familiar doors to me that I learned from my own journey of self-development and seduction. As of these moment, I only read two of his LONG articles. Therefore making me believe that I will still learn a lot from this man.

Again, thanks for reading and keep it light men!

-Twiggy

About The Author

The Cool Jerks Team is a group of men helping other men to understand women.

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